How to Accept Criticism Constructively (And Why You Should)

By: Maria Forget, Social Work Student

Criticism can be difficult to hear, especially when we take pride in what we do. It is hard not to take criticism personally since it could be incredibly specific and not always positive. As humans, we tend to jump to the worst-case scenario and lean towards the negative side of matters. Some of us may focus on the negative, as one negative word said has the potential to outshine the positive. This can create hurt feelings, even though the criticism was not intended to be taken personally.

Even though you may feel you’re putting forth your best efforts, it is almost impossible to be perfect. Criticism should be expected. Some individuals may take criticism constructively and learn from it, while others may feel defeated, resentful, or unfairly targeted. While reactions to criticism vary, you are not helpless because of it. If you feel as though you are especially sensitive to criticism, you came to the right place. I will be discussing some points through personal experience and observations on how one could accept criticism constructively, and why they should.

How one could accept criticism constructively:

• Don’t take it personally. After the criticism has been said, you may feel as though you have been personally attacked. This is not the case. The qualities of a good professional are being able to accept criticism and not react as if it were a personal attack.
• Listen to what is being told. Do not voice your opinions or try to argue with the person while you are being told the criticism. Listen to what they are telling you and be mindful of your emotions. Your emotions may be getting the best of you at first. Following the criticism, give yourself a chance to process your emotions, reflect critically and calm down. If you believe that the criticism is unfair, ask to discuss it afterward.
• Give the respect you are receiving. As previously mentioned, being told the truth is a form of respect. Realize this and give back the same kind of respect by taking into consideration what is being said. If you believe there is no truth to the criticism, try to see things from the other person’s perspective.
• Get advice from a third party. If you are unsure that the criticism said is fair or not, ask a trusted third party what they believe. Sometimes you need to hear opinions from an unbiased perspective. But take care with whom you choose to talk to – friends and family may be biased in your favour!
• Consider the repercussions if you take further action. If you want to speak up or argue your case, think about what could potentially happen following those actions. You may ruin the relationship you have with the person who delivered you the criticism or lose their respect. Evaluate the pros and cons of your actions and if some things are worth fighting for or letting go. 

​Why is it important to accept criticism constructively? 

• Feedback helps make you stronger. You may feel as though you are “not good enough” once the criticism has been given; however, this is far from the truth. Use the criticism to help build character and derive strength from it. Use the criticism as an opportunity for improvement.
• Use criticism as a form of self-reflection. Perhaps you were not previously mindful of the fact that you were doing something incorrectly. Or perhaps you realized what you were doing could be done better. Use the criticism to place yourself outside of your shoes and reflect upon how you could use it to improve.
• Appreciate the honesty. It may be hard to hear criticism at first but appreciate that the one delivering it is being honest. Think about how difficult it would be for you to provide criticism to someone else- it can be especially difficult for the other side as well. The person delivering your criticism is being respectful towards you by taking the time to tell you the truth. Look at it from their perspective, as they want to see you grow.